Black Belt Testing - What the Heck am I Doing?!

It’s the end of September. In a little more than one week, I’ll be testing for a Kukkiwon black belt in taekwondo. To say I’m apprehensive is an understatement.

Like seriously, how did I get here?!

I am fully aware that every martial arts studio and program has its own testing methods; no two are alike. Even within taekwondo studios, every studio does its belt ranking differently.

My oldest son, T started taekwondo when he was three. He has always been naturally agile when it comes to physical activity, so he took to taekwondo quickly. The discipline has been great for his ADHD brain and he competed in his first sparring tournament when he was six. He’s been training for eight years and he will be testing for his black belt with me next week.

His instructor, Master Amely, goaded me into attending a “Mom’s Class” one morning when T was almost four. She assured me that I would have fun and I really did. The class kicked my butt and I was unbelievably sore for days afterward. A week later, when it was time to go to the next class, I found out I was pregnant with my youngest son after more than two years of unexplained infertility. I was already feeling fatigue and I didn’t have it in me to attend another class. Master Amely seemed to understand and didn’t push. She also seemed to think she cured my infertility. Maybe??

My youngest son, M started attending classes at 22 months old. His first word was “ay-ya!” and he competed in his first sparring tournament when he was only four. Now, at age seven he takes it very seriously and joined the Extreme Team this year where he gets to learn extra tricking, board breaking, tumbling, and performs choreographed routines at belt graduations and events.

M was four years old before I had the courage and could scrape together enough confidence to attend a taekwondo class again. I was approaching my 40th birthday and struggling with serious body-image issues. Around the time M turned two, I gained about forty pounds and I still don’t know why. I’m fairly certain hormones are to blame, but it was tremendously frustrating to get used to my body at 2-3 sizes bigger than what has always been normal for me. Even after three years of taekwondo training, I am still working on getting used to it.

I’ve watched bits and pieces of the black belt test in years past. It’s two days long. It looks exhausting both physically and mentally. I’ve seen candidates fail who were younger and more fit than me. There are physical challenges that I know will push me past the boundaries of my abilities. There’s a grueling physical fitness test, a written test, a Poomsae test, a sparring test, self defense (5 vs 1), a 5k run, and we have to create and execute a board breaking routine. We have to assist in teaching classes for 80 hours and do 20 hours of community service. We have to get letters of recommendation from teachers and parents (for those under 18). We have to write eight different essays beforehand and we have to create a 1-minute video with photos and voiceover talking about our black belt journey.

There’s a reason they only have black belt testing once or twice a year.

My body is so tired and my brain is fried. My left hip and IT band are giving me issues and there’s a spot behind my right knee that aches. I have almost-constant foot pain and my neck and shoulders are screaming to take a break from holding up my boobs. To be honest, I have had more and more thoughts about quitting this week than ever.

But this close and I know I can’t quit. I need to do this both for my kids and for myself. I need to be able to show them how practice, patience, and hard work can pay off and that even at my age, I can do things that are both physically and mentally challenging. 

I stuck with taekwondo because I loved the workouts. I never had any intention of belt testing or even considering a black belt. I finally did my first color belt test just to show my kids that I could.

As I earned higher belts and the curriculum got more challenging, I realized that I needed to do this for myself as well. Making my family and friends proud is one thing, but I need to be proud of myself. I have never set a goal quite like this before. I spent most of my 30s caring for my kids and never really making time to take care of myself; both mentally and physically.  A large part of me is hoping that reaching this massive goal will help boost my confidence and body image. I have struggled with accepting my body since pregnancies resulted in drastic changes. Perhaps this accomplishment can help me love and accept the body I am in. If anything, I will be proud of all of my hard work and how it all has paid off.

Follow me on TikTok!

As a middle-aged lady, AKA: member of the Oregon Trail Generation, I avoided TikTok as much as I avoided Twitter… which was a lot. But this spring a friend convinced me that TikTok could be a potentially awesome funnel for my business, so I begrudgingly downloaded it. I’m still learning how to upload videos at different lengths and how to find music that fits, all while trying to figure out how to create interesting content. But I’m starting to feel more and more comfortable with it.

My new Canvas Lamp has TOTALLY helped with this. You can read about it here.

One thing I do know, TikTok is a HUGE time suck. I will flip through a few videos and suddenly two hours have passed. I’ll go all day without looking at TikTok and see 50+ notifications that my sister or my husband has shared videos with me. #enablers

I plan to keep the content art-related as much as possible. I did post a video last week of me making peach jam, so there will be randoms non-art here and there. Although some may argue that making jam IS an art.

I have gone back and forth many times on whether to share about my taekwondo training and black belt journey. But since my black belt test is in two weeks, I feel like if I was going to document that journey, I should have started six months ago. Oh well. If I ever decide to get a 2nd Dan in taekwondo, maybe I will document THAT journey. Practicing martial arts is a whole other world when you don’t start as a kid.

Any requests on art content?? Any techniques you’d like to see?? I do a lot of landscape watercolor and wet-on-wet painting. I am considering diving back into oil painting, so maybe I’ll take some videos there too.

LÍLLÉbaby Product Manuals

For about four and a half years, I had the pleasure of working for LÍLLÉbaby as a contract graphic designer. They’re a baby carrier company that sells a variety of babywearing products like infant carriers, toddler carriers, stretchy wraps, ring slings, and more.

Their original user manuals used photographs of an adult and a baby to show step-by-step instructions on how to use the baby carriers. Some of the photos weren’t very clear on how each step was performed and in some instances, it was tough to get the baby to cooperate (which is totally understandable!). Plus, if any of the photos needed to be retaken, it was very difficult to find another baby the same size/age to recreate an image and maintain continuity.

They came to me with the idea of having a simplified drawing for each step rather than a photograph AND a goal to make the drawings as clear as possible so there could be as little text as possible. When these products are shipped to different countries, they have to have the manuals translated into different languages. Some phrases get confused in translations, so if the drawings were very clear, then there would hopefully be less confusion.

We started with the stretchy wrap and ring sling carriers. These first manuals were fun to create as a single page that folded up to be a little bigger than a business card.

From there we slowly started rebranding all of the booklet manuals for their existing Complete and CarryOn carriers.

As the years went on and they launched new products, I was thrilled to get to create new manuals for them; from carriers and wraps to accessories like a rain cover and a snuggly winter cover. For most products, we eventually created an international version that included all of the translated languages in one, big manual.

LÍLLÉbaby carriers were already my favorites when my boys were babies, so my knowledge on how their products work was integral in drawing these as clear and concise as possible. Understanding safe and correct babywearing made it easy for me to create these drawings and be in compliance with safety regulations and reduce any liability on the company.

Each new product was a new and fun challenge and they were truly a pleasure to create.

Product of the Month - September 2021 - Squarespace

It’s time for another Product of the Month, and I’m almost running out of items to feature. At this point, I’m not sure if I can get through the whole year. My goal is to get through 2021, and then I’ll do occasional “Featured Products” or “Featured Tools” on future posts rather than one every month.

This month I’m featuring the company I use for my website: Squarespace!

While I did go to college to learn digital and traditional art, visual development, and graphic design, one thing I did not learn is how to build a website from scratch. I don’t know HTML or CSS or any other acronyms that involve website coding. I have a basic understanding of WordPress, but that’s kind of it!

Nothing was more frustrating when looking for a job about 15 years ago than seeing a job listing for a “graphic designer” and seeing HTML, CSS, and Dreamweaver listed under required skills. A web designer and a graphic designer are very different jobs!

Of course, these days, plenty of companies want their graphic designers to do it ALL… graphic design, print layout, email marketing, web design, UI design, social media marketing, and video content creation and editing. Oy!

I used to have a simple website that a friend set up for me years ago that I managed through WordPress. But after a few years it was hacked. and I lost a LOT of blog posts and content. I didn’t want to deal with another WordPress site and have to keep plugins updated and secure. I wanted someone else to handle that.

Enter: Squarespace.

Building my website was so simple and they made it so intuitive to make a really beautiful website. Does it cost more each month than I could be paying through WordPress? Yes. But having everything in one spot (theme, security, hosting, design) and knowing they are keeping my site secure is worth it.

Product of the Month - August 2021 - Canvas Lamp

A while back I raved about the little iPhone clip and ring light that I got from Amazon during the pandemic. Well, I’ve upgraded to something that is working better for me. Introducing my Canvas Lamp!

I first saw this awesome lamp through an artist I follow on TikTok. She did a video showcasing the top five products that help her run her small business. This lamp was one of them and she even included a code for 10% off. I was sold!

BTW, I’m on TikTok now, look me up! Alex Tebow

This is such a neat tool! The lamp can hold my iPhone 11 easily and it can be adjusted for a variety of smart phones, cameras, and even a GoPro. The base is heavy and sturdy and has no issues holding the weight of the lamp and my phone. I can pivot and adjust the position of the light for direct, overhead painting or I can turn it on an angle like I have been doing with my phone on a little tripod. I can even turn it around and use it in selfie mode if needed.

The Canvas Lamp also came with a clamp to let me attach it to the edge of a table if there isn’t room for the base or if I don’t want to use the base.

The ring light itself is awesome and the brightness is adjustable along with the color and tone of the light. It can be warm light, cool light, or somewhere in between.

Even if I’m not shooting a video of my painting, the light itself is fantastic just to work with and easily adjusted to where I need it.

I cannot wait to share some of the videos I’ve been making with this wonderful tool. Highly recommended!!

Product of the Month - July 2021 - Thermarest Compressible Travel Pillow

Earlier this year, I decided to start featuring favorite tools that I use in my work or even just in my adventures. I have featured art supplies and backpacks and tools. This month’s featured product is a pillow. Yup, you read that right; I’m sharing about a pillow. There are affiliate links in this post, in case you want to buy one of these products and Amazon will send me a few cents in appreciation.

Last summer, my son wanted to get into backpacking. Not wanting to drop $1000 on backpacking gear only to have us quit after just one short trip, I research the crap out of our options; especially on items that could make sleeping more comfortable for my 40-something-year-old body that hadn’t backpacked in more than 20 years.

There are lots of inflatable pillows out there that weigh next-to-nothing, but that very first trip taught me that I don’t like sleeping on an inflatable pillow. I need something more substantial than that.

Enter the Thermarest Compressible Travel Pillow. It comes in sizes from Small (12x16 in) to X-Large (16.5x27 in) and they weigh less than a pound. It’s a pillow filled with chunks of memory foam that can be rolled up and compressed down to a little less than half of its size. It definitely takes up more space in my pack than the cheap inflatable pillow that I got before, but this one is SO much more comfortable. It feels like I’m sleeping on a regular pillow.

My Thermarest Pillow strapped to my pack with a bungee kept it fluffy for my 3-night trip.

I ended up finding a size Small pillow on Sierra.com for $14.99 and then I bought a Large one from my local Scheels at full price. I just liked it that much.

When they’ve been compressed and rolled up, they do take a little time to puff up again. Depending on how long they were stored rolled up, it may take quite a while. When I went backpacking back in May, rather than roll up my pillow each night, I just strapped it to the outside of my pack so it would stay as fluffed as possible.

Little did I know that these two pillows would turn out to be wonderful and incredibly useful for much more than just backpacking. We take them with us camping and they are fantastic to have in the car on road trips. I’m a side sleeper and I like to sleep with a pillow hugged to my chest. When I’m camping, I can easily use the Small pillow and still fit in my sleeping bag. I have been trying to justify getting one or two more pillows for future trips.

I also take the small pillow for when we spend a whole day out at a lake. My husband and my kids will spend the day fishing and I paint, read a book, or take a nap in my hammock and the pillow is super comfortable to sleep on and easy to pack into my backpack or even just a tote bag.

Since we had that pesky pandemic last year, I haven’t tried these pillows on an airplane yet, but I’m willing to bet they would work wonderfully to help my kids or me get a little sleep on the flight; whether it’s leaned against a bulkhead or a loved one’s shoulder.

Once my pillows get out of the dryer, I’ll add side by side images of them open and fluffed and then rolled up next to a standard Nalgene bottle so the sizing can be compared.

The BEST part of all: these pillows are machine washable and go in the dryer. Nothing fluffs up the pillow more than throwing it in the dryer. Obviously that’s not helpful when I’m backpacking, but knowing these can get dusty, dirty, or fall into a lake (I know that from experience!) or…. you know… drooled on… and then they can easily be washed when I get home gives me so much peace of mind. Huzzah!!

Redbubble Store Merch

As much as I love being able to sell stickers of my artwork that I order and mail myself, I have been wanting to offer my artwork on a few different products. But I don’t want to have to buy the equipment to print on these items and then stress about shipping them. I already stress about the stickers and small prints I have, and they are pretty small!

So I have been looking for websites that will let me upload my artwork and sell fun items and I can make a few bucks when something sells. I sell a few t-shirt designs on Zazzle and I literally make $0.40-$0.60 on each shirt that gets sold. Yeah… that’s it. But it’s a place that people already know about to find fun t-shirt graphics.

So I’m giving Redbubble a try. I have set up a store with five paintings of my artwork. You can check it out HERE.

I’m just starting with a few right now. And once I have a handle on how it works, I may start adding new artwork that can also be printed on apparel. I love that you can get my paintings printed onto a coffee mug, magnet, water bottle, or a drawstring backpack or a throw pillow.

This artwork here on a drawstring backpack may be a new one for my fans. I made this painting of Delicate Arch from Arches National Park last year and gave it to a friend for her birthday. I am thinking of doing another sticker series like I did for “I heart Public Lands” and feature National Park Service sites and #npslover on them. I’m hoping to see more national park sites in the coming years so I can get more photo reference.

Anyone know of any other sites that work like this? I would like to sell prints through Redbubble, but they don’t let me pick and choose the print and poster sizes, and my images are too small for posters. I would like to sell greeting cards too, but they are grouped in with posters. I also would LOVE to find one site that does everything I want and not have multiple different websites where I sell merch…. someday.

Traveling: Asian Vacation with Our 3-Year-Old

I wrote this in the spring of 2013 when I ran a parenting blog. My kids are much older now, but when the blog went away, I wanted to save a handful of the posts I’d written. This is one of them:

Who says that once you have kids, you can’t travel anymore? In October of 2012, my husband and I spent two and a half weeks in Hong Kong, Macau and Hainan, China with our three year old son, TJ.

Even though we were experienced travelers at the time, I was still a little worried about how our 3 year-old would handle the lengthy flights. Up until this trip, the longest flight he’d ever been on was only six hours.

Just getting to Asia was an adventure in itself as we flew on employee benefits, so that meant flying standby:

• Salt Lake City to San Francisco

• Overnight in San Francisco with family

• San Francisco to Seattle

• Seattle to Narita, Japan

• Overnight in Narita

• Narita to Hong Kong

• Hydrofoil ferry to Macau

TJ took the multiple flights in stride playing with his toys, taking naps when needed, playing an occasional game of Angry Birds on the iPad, and enjoying the in-flight entertainment. This trip got him hooked on the show Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.

In between flights, we made sure to find a place in the airport or ferry terminal where TJ could run around and my husband and I took turns playing and chasing after him. Both of us made a point to let him get his wiggles out whenever possible. We taught him how to say thank you in both Japanese and Cantonese and he often said the wrong one, which was adorable to everyone.

If we were in a very crowded space, my husband and I took turns wearing TJ on our backs in our Beco Carrier. It gave us a tremendous sense of security in a foreign place.

We also tried to encourage some excitement about each of the flights explaining to TJ that we were flying on a Boeing 777 or an Airbus A330; his first times flying on those “grown-up airplanes.”

Once it was time to head home, we flew non-stop from Hong Kong to San Francisco. That was the longest flight TJ had ever been on at twelve hours long (me too!), and it wasn’t easy as we were stuck in middle seats with my husband sitting in front of us.

TJ managed to take a two and a half hour nap and then a second nap near the end that was about an hour long. When we wanted to get up and walk around, turbulence would pick up and we had to stay in our seats. Since I can’t sleep sitting up, I didn’t get any sleep and managed to watch four movies. In all honesty, I think that flight was harder on me than it was on TJ.

One thing that really helped with the long flight was that TJ got a new toy or a treat every couple of hours. We bought a couple of very small toys at a gift shop in Hong Kong and he got to open a new toy if he had been behaving for a few hours. He got a new garbage truck, a construction vehicle and a fire truck along with a couple of chocolate coins from See’s Candies that we had brought with us. TJ didn’t know how many toys we had bought, only that if he started getting really bored and fidgety or cranky, Daddy would pop his head over the seat and say, “Are you ready for a surprise?”

Overall, it was an amazing trip. I adored watching TJ play with his cousins even though they couldn’t speak each other’s languages. Both my husband and I enjoyed tasting and eating some amazing food with TJ. My boy adores fish, and it’s quite abundant in southern China. The three of us swam in the warm waters of the South China Sea, we got to pick out our dinner from a fisherman’s catch of the day, we hiked through a tropical rainforest, we walked around Victoria Peak, we rode the ferry across Hong Kong Harbor at night and saw an amazing skyline and we got to meet countless aunts, uncles, cousins and relatives whom I still haven’t figured out their relation to TJ. Everyone was warm, friendly and they really made our trip the best it could be.

Playing in the South China Sea in Hainan

This trip occurred just after TJ turned three, and I know that many of us can remember some bits of our lives when we were that young. I know I do. It is my sincere hope that TJ remembers at least some of this trip.

To end here are some additional tips that worked, and lessons we learned from this trip that can hopefully help parents with the notion that once you have a child, international travel is still possible… contrary to what you may have believed or been told.

• Bring whatever lovey, blanket, beloved stuffed animal, or pacifier if necessary to help your child sleep. We had been working on weaning TJ from his paci at bedtime and naptime, but we totally relaxed the rules while on this trip. He was still only allowed to have his paci if he was going to sleep, but we were a little more lax about it on the airplanes.

• Bring some snacks for your child that you know he or she will eat. Because of the disruption and confusion with meal times and nap times, TJ wasn’t all that interested in any of the in-flight meals that were provided. He was more interested in playing with the spoon and fork like drumsticks when it was dinnertime on the plane. Luckily we brought some fruit strips, fruit and veggie pouches, crackers, granola bars, and some fresh fruit with us so he could eat when he was hungry.

• If you are sightseeing, be conscious of your child and their need to have some plain old playtime. A couple of days into our trip, TJ was cranky, whiny and easily frustrated despite having a great night’s sleep. We realized that we had been shuttling him from house to house and attraction to attraction, he hadn’t had more than a few minutes each day to simply play. Once we were able to let him have an hour or two at a local playground, it let his mind and body reset and he was a happy boy again. Because there was so much we wanted to do, and so many people we wanted to visit, we made sure to schedule some play time every day or every other day depending on how TJ was doing.