Lunar New Year 2023

Did you know that in some countries that celebrate the Lunar New Year, it lasts for about two weeks? Lots of businesses in China and Taiwan shut down completely during this time. This year's Lunar New Year celebrations, starting the Year of the Rabbit, will come to an end this weekend.

My MIL and my kids in 2016

San Francisco's Chinese New Year Parade is pretty famous and it usually takes place at the end of the holiday. When my husband and I lived in California, we made a trip to Chinatown one year when our oldest son was a toddler to watch the parade in-person. It was a lot of fun! Since then, we make a point to try and find a broadcast of the parade online to watch as a family. This year will be no exception with the parade happening tomorrow evening, February 4th. 

My husband's family is from southern China, and these are some of the traditions that we've woven into our family. From what I have learned, these are similar among many Chinese families. 

It's tradition for folks to spend this time with their families; especially if they don't live close to them. It's considered lucky to wear red and there are lots of traditions one follows to ensure an auspicious new year. Many families do a thorough clearing of their home to sweep out any bad luck from the previous year. It's actually considered bad luck to clean your house, or cut your hair, on Lunar New Year's Day because you will sweep out any new good luck or cut your chances for a prosperous new year. 

My oldest not knowing what to do with his lucky money.

On Lunar New Year's Eve, families usually get together for a big dinner chocked full of dishes that represent positive aspirations for the new year. There is often steamed whole fish (prosperity), chicken (togetherness) or duck (loyalty), noodles (long life), and dumplings (wealth). It's not uncommon for families to come together to make dumplings for this meal. Deep fried spring rolls are also common because they look like little gold bars.

We sometimes have sweet desserts, but my in-laws have tried to teach my kids that oranges and tangerines (success & wealth) make a great dessert too. And they are luckier with the stem and leaves still attached. Some years, my mother-in-law has made sweet, deep-fried, sesame cookies called zhà má yè.    

Here’s a website that has some really wonderful Chinese recipes that are popular around the Lunar New Year.

This year my husband smoked a whole duck and my mother-in-law steamed a whole fish. We had sweet, sticky rice, that had diced char-siu (bbq pork), onions, ginger, and mushrooms. We had homemade bao (buns) to make little sandwiches with slices of the smoked duck, spring onion, and hoisin sauce; similar to Peking Duck.

Our Lunar New Year dinner this year

Of course, the part my kids most look forward to: Lucky Money! Pronounced lai see in Cantonese or hong bao in Mandarin. Traditionally children and unmarried adults receive red envelopes from parents, grandparents, aunts, and uncles that contain money. Sometimes they have a "lucky" amount too. The number eight sounds very similar to "get rich" in Chinese, so it's considered a very lucky number. We've often seen dollar amounts given in eights ($8, $88, etc.).

My kids digging into their red envelopes in 2016, back when they were still cute!

My in-laws and my husband's aunts also give our kids red envelopes for their birthdays. My mother-in-law still gives my husband and me a red envelope at the Lunar New Year and on our birthdays too.

In celebration this year, I created a Lunar New Year cootie catcher. The symbolic items on there are pretty specific to many Chinese traditions. You can purchase and download a printable file from my Etsy shop.

Are you from a country that celebrates the Lunar New Year? If so, how do you traditionally celebrate? I would love to make a cootie catcher that is unique to how you celebrate. Are there different symbolic foods, items, or animals in Vietnam, Thailand, or Korea? Anywhere else? Please share!

A Mom’s Superpower to Combat Busy Life

You ever have times in your life where there is just so much going on, you don’t feel like you can catch your breath? Life has been busy for us these months; pretty much from April-on. It’s the kind of busy where I’ve done plenty of Instagram-worthy things, but haven’t managed the time to post about them. And then when I do have a minute to breathe, I don’t want to do anything at all.

A few years back, when I ran a parenting blog, we asked all of our writers/moms if they could have any superpower, what would it be?

One mom’s answer really stuck with me and I still think of it from time to time… mostly times like right now.

She wished she had a superpower where her body did not need sleep. Between working full-time, caring for her family, and all of the day-to-day things that consumed her available time, she realized that if she didn’t need sleep, there were so many hobbies and interests she could pursue.

In a nutshell, she never really had time for herself, and she felt this most profoundly when her children were young. Her kids are older now, and I hope she has been able to find more time to devote to her own interests.

Times when I feel overwhelmed, like there simply aren’t enough hours in the day to do All. The. Things., I think of this mom and her desired superpower and I wonder just how much I could get done if I didn’t also have to sleep.

Me with a couple of fellow kick-ass moms. Image by Michelle Craig Photography

Cuz like, I’ve done a bunch of things this year that could earn their own blog posts (and will eventually)…

• My oldest son and I had our belt graduation where we finally got our black belts in taekwondo (it’s been pretty fun to wear in class).

• I flew to the Bay Area by myself for a weekend to say farewell to the man who was a second dad to me growing up (fuck cancer).

• Went on a wonderful retreat in southern Utah with a bunch of amazing women.

Image by Michelle Craig Photography

• Family road tripped to Reno where my kids competed in a taekwondo tournament to qualify for Nationals.

• Both my kids did competition track & field for the first time and were killing it at track meets and learning new events and skills.

• I have a new gig as social media manager and graphic designer for our competition running club (follow us! @wolfpackingrunningutah on Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok).

• I got some new tools for my freelance work that I’m excited to share about.

• My parents came to Utah for a visit and we were able to take my dad on a couple of our favorite hikes.

My boys with my dad on the trail to Cecret Lake in Albion Basin.

• My paternal grandma passed away at the age of 102.

• My kids both competed in USA Taekwondo Nationals in July and my oldest earned a gold medal in black belt sparring in his age and weight class.

• I dipped my toes into the world of art festivals and had a booth at two local festivals. It was really fun and I actually made a few bucks. Show #1 and Show #2. I also entered two paintings into a city art show and I won a 2nd place ribbon!

• I made the decision to begin training for my 2nd degree black belt in taekwondo and will decide when to test (either next May or next December).

• My youngest son was asked to be the main character in a short film that is both a comedy and horror and learned a ton about how films are made.

• Both of my kids are doing competition cross country and are doing awesome at meets. They both are hoping to qualify for USATF Jr Olympic Nationals in Texas in December.

• My family was heartbroken by the loss of a taekwondo friend who took his own life just before he turned 15.

So yeah… it’s been a busy and tough year, and I have had many moments where I wished I could skip a night’s sleep so I had more time. September was crazy with our kids playing three different sports, plus school, birthdays, a funeral, and lots of emotions. October has been more chill and I am hoping as the weather cools off, November will continue to be chill. Fingers crossed.

Trying to relax on Gooseberry Mesa and enjoy the view.

10 Signs Your Child Might be a Foodie

How many of us start out this parenting gig thinking we’re not going to “let” our kids become picky eaters? We introduce them to a variety of flavors and textures early on and make sure they are encouraged to try everything. You try expose them to foods from different ethnicities, then watch helplessly as they spiral into the threenager stage and will only eat mac n cheese, chicken nuggets, and foods that aren’t “noisy” or “squishy.” What went wrong?!?!

I think most of us can agree, even the most devout of foodies will have kids who go through picky phases. We just have to do our best to keep showing enthusiasm, rule out or work with any allergies or sensitivities to textures or flavors, and do our best to muddle through it; hoping for change as they get older.

My kids went through very picky phases. For a while my oldest wouldn’t eat beef because “it takes too long to chew.” As a toddler he LOVED broccoli, peas, and spinach and then at age four he refused to eat anything that was green.

My husband and I are both big foodies. We try to make a variety of different foods at home and now that our kids are well passed the toddler stages, we usually include them in meal planning. When we travel, what we can eat plays a big role in deciding where we go and we make a point to not eat at restaurants that we have at home. 

I’d love to think that our enthusiasm when it comes to food played a role in how un-picky our kids have become, but I know a LOT has to do with their personalities. We have plenty of foodie friends whose kids are still struggling to outgrow their pickiness.

HERE ARE THE SIGNS:

1. In their head, trying new foods is an adventure rather than a chore or something to fear. Almost ALL samples are tasted at grocery stores and Costco. Latest discovery? Pâté. Our grocery store was sampling a rosemary and duck pâté, spread on little toasts and my son literally closed his eyes and moaned with his first bite. Then he asked if we could buy some for Dad, not knowing that he already loves pâté. 

2. Ask them their favorite food and it will be something many kids (and even many adults) don’t care for or think is gross or weird. My kid? Salmon sashimi. Shoyu ahi poke (raw, marinated tuna). Deep fried chicken livers. Lengua (beef tongue) or cabeza (beef head) tacos.

3. It’s library day at school and your kid checks out cookbooks instead of books about Fortnite or soccer.

4. Their birthday is coming up and rather than ask for a party at the local trampoline park or playground, they ask for a Chopped or Iron Chef-themed party at the local grocery store that has cooking classes. 

5. “What do you want for dinner?” is followed by requests for Japanese teppanyaki, Korean BBQ, Indian curries, or Hawaiian plate lunches.

6. Trying a new recipe? During dinner your foodie kids critique the dish with an assessment worthy of Iron Chef: “The texture is wonderful, but I think it needs to be seasoned a little more.” “I love the blend of flavors, but maybe a side of rice would be better than pasta.”

7. Foodie kid opts for summer cooking classes instead of ninja warrior camp or taekwondo camp.

8. While on vacation you have to explain to your child that they cannot have salmon or tuna for six days in a row… because there’s a mercury thing. I have actually had to have this conversation with my oldest. 

9. When having dinner at a sushi restaurant, your foodie kid ditches their family to sit at the sushi bar and chat with the chef about where the tuna came from or different ways to prepare salmon.

10. Your foodie child skips the cereal or candy aisle at the grocery store and instead browses different spice blends and the meat counter to see what’s on sale. 

I’m so, so grateful we’ve left the picky phase with my kids. Every day I count myself lucky that there are almost no foods that my kids won’t at least taste. They’re still working on foods that are even remotely spicy and raw veggies and salads are still a no-go, but we’re getting there.

Black Belt Graduation

My oldest son and I both earned our Kukkiwon 1st Dan black belts in taekwondo back in October of last year. You can read about my taekwondo journey and me feelings regarding the test here and here’s a rundown of the test itself and my thoughts afterward (spoiler alert: it was really fucking hard).

What does that have to do with art or graphic design? Nothing. But this is my blog and it was pretty cathartic for me to write out my thoughts, so there we go.

We were finally able to have our graduation ceremony a couple months ago in March. Apparently it took a long time for the official certificates to get here from Korea.

Friends and family were invited to attend. Our master instructors were there along with a few studio instructors who were integral to our training. This was seriously a team effort!

The beginning of the graduation involved a trail run up a pretty steep hill where we were all presented with our black belts. I was the LAST one up the damned hill because I didn’t see which direction the group went and I went the wrong way. Also, it was ridiculously muddy, I almost fell multiple times.

We took lots of photos at the top of the hill and then headed back to our studio.

This photo is me with my husband. Anyone who has parented a child through the physical and mental preparation that goes into a martial arts black belt test would agree that there should be a black belt for parents. We have watched quite a few parents go through it and we wholeheartedly agree that they've earned their own kind of black belt.

Compound that with supporting your spouse going through the same-but-different preparation too and you have the level of awesomeness that my husband achieved. It took me a long time to put these feelings into words; which is apparent since our black belt test was months ago.

Part of me didn't want to test alongside my son because I worried that I would focus too much on his training at the expense of my own. My husband was the rock that supported our preparation and it took on multiple forms... Pushing our son when he wanted to quit or refused to listen to me anymore (which was a lot). Commiserating with me and offering ice/heat/massage/ibuprofen when I was in pain. Humoring me when I questioned why the hell I was doing this. Cooking dinner pretty much every night, including the 4-5 nights/week for 2-3 hours we were at the studio. Encouraging me to go to class when I didn't want to, but in a way that wasn't a guilt-trip. Coordinating with other parents to make sure we had support during our black belt test. Making sure uniforms were clean, sparring gear was accounted for, and belts and weapons were always in the car.

I don't know if I would have passed if I hadn't been able to put parenting (and sometimes adulting) on the back burner many nights and I feel like my husband earned this belt almost as much as me.

Wholeheartedly, thank you babe.

Back to the graduation…

We headed back to our studio and changed into uniforms. Our master instructor said a few words about what being a black belt means and how hard we worked for them. Then we all got our belts, one by one.

Actually, there IS a tiny bit of graphic design in this post because I do most of the graphic design for our studio. Here is the printed program I created for our graduation. These were 8.5x11 inches, folded in half, and printed on card stock at our local Office Depot. I kept the color scheme simple with black, gray, and red.

The back cover had a bunch of messages that I asked parents to write to their kids and there is one message from my husband to Rachel and me (the two non-kids). I felt it was a bit too personal to share publicly, but it looked beautiful too.

Lastly, here’s a video one of our master instructors made about our test. She’s pretty darned good at it.

So, that’s it.

But you know the crazy part? I’m thinking about testing for my 2nd degree black belt in October of this year…

Mourning the Age Gap

*I wrote this post in the summer of 2013 when I was in the thick of trying to get pregnant with my youngest son and we were approaching the 2-year mark. I was processing my feelings and writing them for a parenting blog I ran at the time. Since that blog no longer exists, I wanted to save many posts I’d written because writing them back then served as great therapy for me. This is one of them.

A couple of months after my son turned two, I was ready to get back on the baby-making train. We got pregnant with TJ very easily, so I had faith that it would happen for us again within a few months. Little did I know that the universe had other plans for us.

I’m the oldest of four kids, all born about two years apart. Sure, we had our fights when we were young; sharing bedrooms will do that to any siblings. But we were all pretty close and I think we had a pretty rad childhood.

Cut to now, we’re all in our late 20s and 30s and living pretty far apart from each other, yet we are emotionally closer than we have ever been. We constantly support each other the best we can, given our distance.

Even before my son was born, I wanted my kids to be around the same age gap as I am to my siblings. The quantity of children was undecided but I knew I wanted them to be two to three years apart. I felt that the closeness I share with my siblings was due in part to our closeness in age.

Do siblings who are further apart in age still have fantastic relationships? Sure! I just use my own childhood as reference.

We’ve been trying for almost two years to conceive a sibling for TJ. The age gap that I thought I wanted, that I thought was perfect, is now gone. If I were to get pregnant right now, my kids would be more than four years apart. And I have no idea how much bigger that gap is going to get…. whether we conceive a child of our own or look to adoption.

More than 4 years apart and they likely won’t be in high school at the same time, looking out for each other like I did with my brother. They may not like the same generation of kids’ toys and music. Heck, I don’t even know if I will be able to use the same car seats before they expire.

A few months ago, I literally had to mourn the childhood I thought my son was going to have with any siblings… hoping it would be just like mine. I know it’s a silly notion, but the pain I felt was real.

It’s embarrassing to admit, but I was really down about it for a while. One could argue that I have no right to feel so down about my “unexplained infertility” since I have been able to have one amazing little boy when so many women are still struggling to have their first child.

To some extent, that’s true. I feel incredibly blessed to have my son.

But you know what? I’m not done yet. My family isn’t done yet. I know it’s selfish, but I want to experience pregnancy again (even the crappy parts). I want to experience childbirth again. I even want to go through the newborn phase again, no matter how much I will think back to this very moment and say, “what was I thinking?”

As time heals everything, the pain of not having my children when I wanted has lessened. As TJ grows more independent and communicates more effectively, I am seeing more and more how he is going to make an amazing big brother some day. I hope he will be able to cope with the big change that comes when a new baby joins a family; a change that probably would have been much harder on him when he was just two or even three.

Does my heart ache when TJ asks me for a baby brother or baby sister? Hell yes. I still fight back tears when he tells me, “Mommy, try harder.”

But I feel more and more at ease with the fact that the universe will choose the right time, not me.